Category: tech

Al Gore wants you to buy an iPhone

Al Gore is on the board of directors at Apple, but it’s still odd to see the former vice president clapping over a new iPhone ad like it’s a line in a Clinton State of the Union Address.  And people wonder why he didn’t want to run for office again.

I should be writing for Time

Time published an error-plagued article on the new iPhone (bold mine). With the old iPhone (which ran on AT&T’s Edge network) on one side and the new one (which runs on AT&T’s 3G network) on the other, Jobs loaded a photo-heavy Web page at nationalgeographic.com. It took 21 sec. on the 3G phone, versus 59…

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My full geek unleashed

Command center complete. I turned my 20-inch widescreen on its side so I can stack my personal gmail and my professional Google Apps mail on top of each other.

I’m getting dorkier

I ordered a 24-inch widescreen monitor to fill in the empty space on my monitor shelf – the 20-inch widescreen just doesn’t take up enough room.  Mac Mini will run across both big displays, and the XP laptop will stay where it is.  I need more reasons to never leave this room. The “after” picture…

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Time Warner rocks!

Tons of Royals games are in HD this year. Yesterday was the first game.  Channel 1496 was scheduled to show the game, but I couldn’t find it on my guide or even type it in manually.   Last night, Time Warner sent an update to my box, and the channel appeared after the hour-long reboot…

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Grandmas don’t touch my Wii

Why is it still so hard to find a Nintendo Wii?  All the nursing homes are buying them up. Why won’t I let a grandma touch my Wii? Their pruney grandma-hands have crevices that trap all kinds of bacteria and food crums.  I don’t need that on my Wii remote. Plus, they refuse to wear…

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1 of 1000 things wrong with Time Warner

Time Warner’s DVR remote has a really stupid feature, the “Master Power” button. The button seems to randomly decide whether it will function as a master power or as a power button for the currently selected device. So, when your cable box turns itself off for no reason, you’ll press the CBL, then the power…

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Sad day for Barry

Poor Barry. Barry Bonds, Major League Baseball’s all-time home-run leader, was indicted by a U.S. grand jury on charges of obstructing justice and perjury for lying about using steroids. This doesn’t affect my unending desire to play the Barry World on Super Mario Galaxy.

What are the teens up to this time?

Check out those silly teens. More than four in 10 teens, or 43 percent, who instant message use it for things they wouldn’t say in person, according to an Associated Press-AOL poll released Thursday. Twenty-two percent use IMs to ask people out on dates or accept them, and 13 percent use them to break up.…

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Mindblow: NES Zapper

Some friends and I were talking about what a technological marvel the original Nintendo Zapper was. How’d they do that? The Wikipedia explanation hurts my brain. When the trigger was pulled, the game blanked out the screen with a black background for one frame, then, for one additional frame, drew a solid white rectangle around…

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U toucha my Internet, I breaka U face

Check out this headline from a discovermagazine.com story and the accompanying picture: This man wants to control the Internet. And you should let him. With this headline and photo, Discover is basically saying “Yeah, we know he looks like a complete douche, but what he has to say makes sense. Maybe you should listen.” Nice…

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iPhone: For Morons

Have you seen the new iPhone ads with the douches talking about why they needed an iPhone? One particular ad annoys the hell out of me. The guy talks about how he had to carry a bag around to hold all of his electronic devices. Yes, I’ve done the same, but this guy’s reasoning is…

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RIP: The Fonzie Fix

We went to the 810 Zone on the Plaza to watch the MU and KU games yesterday. They have touchscreen computers in the booths. You can watch TV, play games or go online. It’s a pretty cool idea. Our particular computer was dicked, though. It wouldn’t let us select any of the options. They rebooted…

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Overheard: One of those guys

I walked into the Target electronics department just in time to hear the helmet-haired woman behind the glass counter drop something brilliant to a coworker: “He’s one of those guys. He’s a bad boy. But when you break him in, he’s the sweetest guy ever.” I’m assuming this girl is talking about her boyfriend. He’s…

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WTF: NFL in High Def

Today’s Chiefs game isn’t in high definition. Unacceptable. Channel 9’s local news broadcasts in high definition, and you’re telling me CBS doesn’t have enough high-def equipment to cover all their NFL games? They pay $622.5 million per year for NFL rights, and full-HD coverage puts them in the red? WTF? This pisses off and confounds…

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What’s the matter with technology?

I’ve figured out what’s wrong with technology. All the people who appreciate the laziness technology affords don’t get off their asses to invent new stuff. The only reason an automated Jetsons-like shower doesn’t exist at this point is because all of us who think the process should be automated assume that some other lazy-ass will…

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I’m annoyed: Volume Controls

Hey, Internet! Can I get a decent volume control over here? 90 percent of online video players have their volume sliders juiced all the way. Unfortunately, 50 percent of online videos have the volume set at some low-ass level. I need to be able to boost those levels, dumbasses! Solution: keep the default volume where…

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The good thing about spam

Sick of dealing with spam? How about phishing? You could blame people who are dense enough to fall for spam or phishing expeditions for enabling this type of activity. Or you could rest easy knowing that you’re on the smarter side of the population. I do both.

R.I.P. "Internets" and "Interweb"

I’ve decided I’m sick of hearing people say “Internets” and “Interweb.” I love Colbert as much as the next guy, but this is getting worse than overquoting Napoleon Dynamite. Originality, people! Bunch of pwned n00bs.

Have we learned nothing from Demolition Man?

Why do I always think “Judge Dredd” before I realize I mean to be thinking “Demolition Man”? Even though Demolition Man showed how easy it was to defeat a retinal scan 14 years ago, companies keep developing the technology. Snipes was even frozen before the technology was around, and quickly figured out how to defeat…

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Microsoft can do cool stuff, too

Everyone’s been loving on Apple so much for the iPhone that I’m starting to feel bad for poor old, lonely Microsoft. I’ve been showing this video off to friends for the last couple of months anyway, so it deserves a little blog love. It’s a program called Photosynth. If you haven’t seen it, get ready…

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