{"id":279,"date":"2006-06-22T13:41:00","date_gmt":"2006-06-22T13:41:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mattstooks.kcmarketer.com\/?p=279"},"modified":"2006-06-22T13:41:00","modified_gmt":"2006-06-22T13:41:00","slug":"stampede-secrets","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/?p=279","title":{"rendered":"Stampede Secrets"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Today&#8217;s the start of <a href=\"http:\/\/www.countrystampede.com\/\">Country Stampede<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>But don&#8217;t let the &#8220;country&#8221; fool you.  People who hate country still go to the show for the party, drinking and general whoring around.<\/p>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/mattstooks.com\/fatcowboy062206.jpg\" \/><\/div>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\">&#8220;I can feel it kicking!&#8221;<\/div>\n<p>To help the uninitiated, we shared Stampede stories this morning.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/mattstooks.com\/stooks062206stampedeprego.mp3\">Want to get pregnant?  Go to the port-a-potty<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/mattstooks.com\/stooks062206stampedebakebean.mp3\">One caller got into trouble <\/a>when a baked bean worked itself into an awkward place last year.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/mattstooks.com\/stooks062206stampedeladypee.mp3\">Another warned us<\/a> about being an unwilling participant in a golden shower.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/mattstooks.com\/stooks062206stampedebondage.mp3\">We learned that bondage-types are more prevalent at Stampede<\/a> than you might think. <\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/mattstooks.com\/stooks062206stampedereba.mp3\">This guy plans to get him a little piece of Reba<\/a> this year, even though she&#8217;s not scheduled to be there.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Today&#8217;s the start of Country Stampede. But don&#8217;t let the &#8220;country&#8221; fool you. People who hate country still go to the show for the party, drinking and general whoring around. &#8220;I can feel it kicking!&#8221; To help the uninitiated, we shared Stampede stories this morning. Want to get pregnant? Go to the port-a-potty. One caller [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-279","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4pzeu-4v","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/279","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=279"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/279\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=279"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=279"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mattstooks.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=279"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}