Scoop

Shocker! Britney Spears has filed for divorce. He was on the WWE again last night. I wonder if the fact he makes more money wrestling than he ever will as a singer had anything to do with that decision. I wonder if someone told her that her kids would get half their DNA from Federline? Too many unanswered questions.

Meanwhile, he’s being sued for illegally sampling “She Blinded Me With Science.”

And he’s even resorted to rapping out hints with the online game show Gold Rush. Vanilla Ice and MC Hammer were answers to his clues. I’m not even joking. You can watch the entire segment here. Or you can just listen to the good parts below.

Listen to the host explain the ridiculous premise of the game, “Private Dancers,” in which Federline raps while eight guys in camo march around him in some kind of freak dance.

Listen to his MC Hammer clue.

Listen to his Vanilla Ice clue.

Kevin Federline: Famous from 2006-2006.

Don’t let all this Federline nonsense distract you from remembering Anna Nicole Smith exists. Now, that rich guy with the vasectomy says Anna Nicole tried to get him to agree to be on the birth certificate when he visited her in the Bahamas after the baby was born.

“Don’t worry, O! I get stains like that out all the time!”

Paris Hilton was shooting a commercial where she walks from her limo to a scooter. Good lord, she’s desperate for cash. And how does that commercial sell? “Oh my god! Paris has a limo! I can’t afford that! Oh wait! Paris has a scooter! Let’s go to Purple Wave Auction and get one so we can be pretty like Paris!”

Madonna was caught looking ugly after her workout routine. What a bitch.

“I spy a T-1000!”