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Stooksoscope for Monday

Capricorn

Accomplishing things is the name of the game, and you pack double your usual powerful punch, especially when it comes to money matters. Too bad Monopoly money doesn’t count in the real world.


Gemini

You can't go around giving affection always expecting to get it back. The love you make is equal to the love you take, but it doesn't always come back at your from the same source. Sometimes you switch it up and use your left hand.


Libra

Your pleasure in earthly delights is heightened during this cycle of sensual energy. Sink your toes in the grass, get to the beach, or bury your face in Louie Anderson’s stomach and go (motor boating sound effect).


Pisces

Call up your favorite person. He or she can make a trip to the dump a party...especially with their nose for used hypodermic needles.


Stooks Proverb: Easier said than done. Like looking at Bruce Vilanch without a beard.

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