Ms. Hilton Gets Serious. Please Stop Laughing.
Rich girl. Party animal. Jailbird. America’s No. 1 heir-head wants to get out of the bimbo business.
And here’s Paris’ “You can’t see it, but my legs aren’t wide open in this pose” pose.
“Can I move now? My crabs are itchy.”
“I don’t want her to look like Paris Hilton,” says the director, Darren Lynn Bousman, “because I want people to know she got this role because she can act.”
Suuuuure. Riiiiiiiiiiight.
I know I’m not breaking new ground here, but I’m ready for Paris Hilton to go away. And here’s my personalized message to her:
Dear Paris,
Congratulations on milking so much out of life by being a rich slut with a night-vision camera. Rick Salomon deserves some credit for your success, but at the rate you were sitting on it, you likely would’ve ran into a similar scenario had Rick not met you. Do you even realize that this single event is wholly responsible for your fame?
You probably didn’t deserve to go to jail for as long as you did. It was unfair. But it simply mirrored your unfair rise to success in Hollywood as a result of being a filthy, skanky, paparazzi-loving, crotch-rotting snob.
You’ve enjoyed your run. We’ve tolerated it for quite awhile. But, you will not end up a successful actress. You’re an idiot with no qualifications. You look like a bird. Go away.
Sincerely,
Matt
look no further than this “star-studded” cast (not to mention the plot) to understand how paris hilton is qualified to be in this movie.
this movie’s going to stink worse than paris’ rotted gyner.