Five types of people at the Superbowl party:
1. Normal fan
2. There-for-the-dip guy
3. Woman along for the ride
4. Way too intense guy
5. Guy who doesn’t like football but feels the need to talk constantly
You can’t have a way-too-intense guy and the talking guy at the same party. Intense guy will scream at talking guy for talking too loudly when he’s trying to hear Madden’s fat chops smacking together.
“Madden with Cheese. Hold the pickles.”
Today, we named the Superbowl “The John Stossel Pick of the Week,” and gave it the full five stashes. I think it would look something like this:
The High Lady thought the pick was weak, and called in to correct us. Oh yeah, we also got her to do an elephant noise for us.
“I had five children for breakfast!”
I think that picture of Madden was touched up a bit. He looks pretty slender. Maybe it’s the green pants. Or the giant slice of cheese in his hands.
In the bottom picture, it looks like that lady thinks something is going to pop out of that ball at any moment…and she knows it. Kind of like a jack-in-the-box.