Aquarius
You have an unwavering commitment to improving this world. It’s not a corny or impractical sentiment at all, but a fascinating puzzle. You’ve got innovative ideas on how to improve things for everyone here: wear a Richard Nixon mask.
Cancer
Regularly schedule time to appreciate all the joys in your life from the small (chocolate-covered almonds!) to the great (old-people watching).
Scorpio
Make a real effort to get away from it all. Find a few moments to give yourself some TLC. That Waterfalls song is sooo sublime.
Aries
You’re not a little kid — it’s not like your friends get you in trouble. However, it’s undeniable that someone has a good influence on you: Grover. For your own good, maybe you should spend more time with him.
Stooks Proverb: Always look out for number one. And number two…especially if it’s Mark Mangino’s.