Scoop

This is the third story about Angelina Jolie’s bodyguards getting a bit too intense in India. A photographer says one of the hired Indian security guards punched him and then pulled a gun on him. He was also verbally abused.

Tara Reid is talking about her deformed boobs a lot lately. She also says “Taradise,” the reality show that followed her partying, ruined her career. But I’m thinking it was the “maybe I can score with Tara Reid if I cast her” mentality was the reason she had a career in the first place. So now that she resembles a “safety first with your deli slicer” poster, that’s not so much the case anymore.

“Survey says: Freddy Krueger.”

Michael Jackson’s spokesperson says he hasn’t been to St. Tropez, France in years. So there’s no way pictures of him in women’s clothing could be him. And since he wasn’t treating a 12-year-old like a sock puppet, I know it wasn’t him.

Katie Holmes parents are threatening to boycott her wedding if all she’s going to do is have a pretend wedding with the Scientologists.

Scroll down the same article, and you’ll find out about Britney Spears plans to get back in prime shape for Federline’s record release on Halloween. And if she can’t get back to her old self, she can always just say she’s going as white trash for Halloween.

Madonna has a new children’s book coming out October 24th. Some believe that may be her motive for trying to adopt a kid from Malawi, rather than a simple desire to ruin an impoverished kid’s life. In the meantime, some human rights groups are going to try to stop the adoption Monday in court.

Jennifer Aniston bought a $15 million home in Beverly Hills. That house better come with Luke Perry for that price.

Bill Murray partied with some students in Scotland. He even helped was some dishes. That’s cool as hell. I don’t think he does the panty drop as good as Paris, though, so I doubt anything too scandalous happened.

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