Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)

Your spirits need a boost. It's time to take yourself out. You can go solo or not, but it's important to get out there and have a fantastic time. Beware of yelling “weeeee!” while riding the Farris wheel alone.

Cancer (June 22 - July 22)

Things can get heated on the work front. You know it's time for your star to shine, but someone else may not be in total accordance. Install a trip wire in their office.

Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)

Doing the right thing is a constant theme in your life. It's time to let your personal star shine brightly, and take out anyone who stands in your way, even if it’s Paul Reiser.

Aries (March 21 - April 19)

Your audience just loves it when you keep them guessing. Heck, you're starting to get pretty fond of it yourself. When you have no expectations, oftentimes you end up surprising yourself with the results. But do you really need to use monkey feces for your abstract art?

Stooks Proverb: To err is human. To suck blood out of people’s necks is vampire.