Scoop

Britney Spears has shown off her vagina three nights in the past week. She hasn’t been wearing panties:

“Whats that flapping sound? Whoops, caught some wind, there.”

But, Britney’s days of being pantie-free look numbered. She just dropped $3 thousand at the place Katie Holmes got her wedding underwear at.

As I think about this odd Britney pantie shortage, I just can’t help but picture K-Fed, high off his ass, sniffing pantie after pantie. Gotta love the pre-divorce pantie raid.

Kevin may have been cheating on Britney with a porn star. From a source “they’re just friends who like to have sex.” Nice friend.

Mel Gibson on Michael Richards: “They’ll probably torture him for a while and then let him go. I like him.” You would like Michael Richards, too, if he just out-racist you.

Jesse Jackson’s boycott isn’t working. Seinfeld season seven DVD is outselling season six by 75 percent, and outselling season five by 90. I think the KKK will be disappointed when they realize Kramer, the character, isn’t really racist.

Latest reason Pamela and Kid Rock divorced: Pam parties too much. And he would always end up back at home, watching her kids. That’s the price of having sex at Pamela Anderson, Kid.

Danny DeVito was likely drunk on Wednesday’s The View.

First, we find out he’s been drinking all night with George Clooney, and hasn’t been to sleep.

Then, he talks about having sex with his wife, Rhea Perlman, in the Lincoln Bedroom at the White House. Yes, THAT Rhea Perlman. There’s just something off-putting about Danny DeVito talking to Rosie O’Donnell about having sex with his wife in the White House

“Now imagine us with George Wendt mixed in.”

Finally, Rosie has him try to read off some cue cards.

A judge has thrown Anna Nicole Smith out of her house in the Bahamas. She didn’t even show up to court to make a defense for the house. I wonder which rich guy will get it sat-on next.

Lindsay Lohan is carrying around the 12 steps. Think AA. But not because she’s an alcoholic. I’m still not sure why.

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