Scoop

Sad: Joe Barbera of Hanna-Barbera died at 95. They had tons of badass cartoons: Flintstones, Jetsons, Yogi, Scooby, Don Knotts, The Harlem Globetrotters, Sonny and Cher…

Britney got booed off the jumbotron at the Laker game Sunday, and then left at halftime. Here’s a flattering shot someone got of the jumbotron:

“This shot misses my vagina completely! Quick, mister! Lift and spread!”

Britney showed up to her mom’s birthday in this outfit:


“What? My cooter’s covered.”

The tabloids continue to think Britney’s makeout dude, J.R. Rotem, is trying to milk his publicity. Because, surely some professional music producer would never get into decent clubs or partake in drugs or alcohol on his own accord.

Paris Hilton has a male masseuse who comes to her house. Hopefully she pays enough for him to afford a female delouser to go to his house.

Esquire quotes Katie Couric: “You guys even take a shot at me. You have something about how since I’ve become an anchor, you don’t know me anymore. You don’t know me anymore? Bite me.” Then she smiled, and said, “help me come up with a cool closing line for the news. Something along the lines of ‘smile your troubles away…'”

Japan canceled a Christmas appearance by Michael Jackson over outrage at his $3,300 price tag for individual photographs and meetings with fans. No performance. But if you happen to meet certain unspecified criteria, you just might get quite the individual performance later on. For free.

Mel Gibson’s a sloppy eater.

“Is that the blood of a Jew on your shirt, Mel?

Photographers thought they had a symbolic gesture when they rescued a Paris Hilton poster from Paris Hilton’s trash bags. I guess they didn’t catch the irony. And how dangerous is rummaging through trash associated with Paris Hilton? You could probably get diseased off just a whiff of it.

After turning it down three times, Joey Fatone says he wants to be on Dancing with the Stars. If John O’Hurley can wrestle Family Feud away from Richard Karn after “Dancing,” surely Fatone could land “Blind Cash Cab,” after some exposure.

Omarosa says Miss California will take over for Miss USA, who’s so much a drugaholic that she’s been photographed with Axl Rose, who I’ve finally given up on completely.

Tori Spelling is still pregnant, but she’s pretending to be a mom by pushing her pug around in a carriage. Seems stable enough.

“I can get used to this much quicker than the whole breastfeeding thing, Miss Mimi La Rue. I’m still sore.”

Clay Aiken can sing through vertigo, and you probably can’t. Loser.

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