Justin Timberlake’s producer/songwriter Timbaland says he and Justin are ready to bring Britney back to some kind of musical form once she becomes somewhat reasonable. Maybe JT just needs her for “Rancid box in a box.”
Britney didn’t take Kevin Federline’s Ferrari away after all. Or he just got it out of her garage during one of her rituals.
Angelina Jolie should have her new Vietnamese boy in time for the Summer. Madonna thinks she could beat that.
Tom Cruise plans to stalk his wife at work. He’ll be taking her to work on the film “Mad Money” every day when it starts filming in the next month. If she wants out of the dungeon, this is the price.
OJ Simpson says he had a fling with Anna Nicole Smith, and his slow moving sperm may make him the baby daddy. Keeping it classy, OJ said “I don’t want Fred Goldman trying to seize her money – or the baby herself.”
Court TV has hired Star Jones to host a legal show this Fall. I smell a Nancy Grace throwdown.
President Bush’s daughter Jenna is writing a book about her experiences with UNICEF. I imagine each chapter starts with “First, we picked up a bottle of Viaka.”
Naomi Campbell has to clean floors at a New York City warehouse as part of her reparations to the law. Hint: it’s hard to clean a floor by throwing a cell phone at individual specks of dirt.
Jennifer Aniston has a new routine. When she sees photographers, she turns around and walks backward so they can’t get a shot…until she falls on her ass.
You could win a lunch date with Miss USA. Disclaimer: the Miss USA Competition isn’t liable for any vomit, urine or other bodily fluid-related stains.