Britney Spears blames Paris Hilton for everyone seeing her vagina, alcoholism, Kevin Federline…Okay, not Federline. But might as well throw him in there.
Paris Hilton has a May 4th court date to decide whether to revoke her probation for driving with s suspended license. If she does have to do some time, maybe she could smuggle Nicole Richie in and use her to pick the lock.
Sanjaya is officially one of Maxim Online’s girls of the day. Ha.
Madonna, not looking to adopt, took her son back to his orphanage for a visit. Students gathered around the building and threw stones to block paparazzi from taking pictures. Hopefully, she’ll move there so we don’t have to see or hear about her anymore.
Grey’s Anatomy homophobe Isaiah Washington will play a priest who returns to the Catholic high school where he was molested growing up. This should play out interestingly.
John Travolta says he’s as big as Elvis and Marilyn Monroe, but Scientology kept him from getting dead like them. Xenu offers one bitchin’ health plan.
Want to get into bestiality, but can’t get past the stigma? Jessica Alba and her dog are here to help.
HBO’s Entourage is paying Ron Jeremy $500 a day to use his two balconies. He said they even cleaned up two years worth of bird crap on them. Yeah…bird crap…that’s it.
Somehow creepier than Michael Jackson: a fiberglass replica of the King of Pop on eBay.
Disclaimer: this mannequin is incapable of molestation.