Paris Hilton says her 45 day jail sentence is unfair and “I don’t deserve this.” It seems a bit much for driving with a suspended license, but she deserves something. Maybe they could just put a chastity bracelet on her goods.
Paris’ mom is pretty pissed about the whole deal. She told the prosecutor “this is pathetic.” Later, she said “I can’t believe all the money we’ve spent on this.” She didn’t specify whether “this” means the legal hearings or just Paris in general.
Paris will likely spend little actual time in jail, despite her sentence. “Lost” actor Michelle Rodriguez spent two hours in the same jail, even though she was sentenced to 60 days for the same offense as Paris. Overcrowding and her plague-like pantie crickets will likely get Paris similar treatment.
Even Lindsay Lohan feels bad for Paris. Now, if she could just address Herbie Fully Loaded.
Jada Pinkett Smith believes Katie Holmes still has free will…twice a day to use the can.
If celebrity fashion trends mean anything to you, we can expect high-waisted “mom jeans” to make a comeback. Britney Spears did not contribute to this trend.
Kid Rock says he had a confrontation with Anna Nicole at last year’s Kentucky Derby. Anna had cameras following her around for a TV show, and Kid was a little annoyed. They cursed at each other a whole lot, he called her a pig, all in front of his son. When Kid got home, he found out Anna gave his kid $300 to apologize. He said “That blond girl with the big boobs gave it to me.” Does that rule out Pam Anderson?
Spiderman 3 is selling out four times faster than Spiderman 2. It set a new record for an opening weekend at $150 million.
Here’s a fun, new statue of Kate Moss. Should Britney sue for the statue infringing on her signature pose?
“Alright, now who has a Nerf football? Preferably one that whistles when you throw it.”