Leo

You've got someone under your skin -- and frankly, it's pretty irritating. Having a full grown person protruding as a goiter out of the side of your neck can be quite uncomfortable.

Sagittarius

Being irresistible isn't exactly a foreign concept for you, but the stars give your magnetism extra heft these days. People fall under your spell as if hypnotized. But it's likely due to the chemical reactions of the brain when exposed to your B.O.

Taurus

Ouch! Is that crick in your neck from you feeling like the whole world is resting on your shoulders? Oh, my bad. I didn’t see that you were giving Louie Anderson a piggyback ride.

Virgo

It takes less energy to tackle the task you've been dreading than it does to bob and weave to avoid it. In fact, once you walk right up to this fearsome monster, you'll see that it's not so bad after all. No tool is more valuable than a good plunger.

Stooks Proverb: Blood is thicker than water. Not as thick as gravy, though. That’s the only thing keeping Mark Mangino from putting it on his mashed potatoes.