Leo (July 23 - August 22)

You're on the receiving end of some unusual celestial energy right now, especially when it comes to trusting your inner wisdom. Oh, wait, that’s just Olive Garden indigestion.

Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)

Be on the lookout for miscommunications, especially where relatives, loved ones and old friends are concerned. Your mind is on other things. Make sure they know you're listening to them when they speak. Maybe you should take that Patrick Duffy poster down so you can pay better attention.

Taurus (April 20 - May 20)

A desire to make the world a better place fills your heart. Unfortunately, a desire to film your own Bumfights videos fills your funny bone.

Virgo (August 23 - September 22)

Does it seem as if someone's always busy right when you want to talk to them? Communication styles are slightly out of sync right now. Chalk it up to those eccentric stars. Wait it out with patience and good humor. Try using those hilarious cancer jokes you read online.

Stooks Proverb: What you don’t know can’t hurt you, unless what you don’t know is that Rosie is doing her upside-down depression therapy directly above you.