Scoop

Britney Spears took in a Laker game this weekend. They mounted her on a pole and used her vagina as the goal.

Avil Lavigne says her mom forced her to a Britney Spears concert before Avril got famous.

Howard K. Stern’s appeal got denied. That means we should get to find out the true baby daddy this week. I’m out of jokes for this.

Anna’s corpse judge is talking face-to-face with different television networks this week. Hopefully he can hold back his tears when he gets rejected.

Idol contestants are getting pissed at America’s Sanjaya-loving ways. They still think Sanjy is cool as a person, they just think he sucks more than other people going home, and it’s all America’s fault.

Rosie’s now feuding with Bill O’Reilly. He started it, calling her an “imbecile.” Shortly after, Donald called Bill to remind him about Rosie’s fatness, as well.

Tara Reid’s bikini top seemed a bit too small this weekend. Her areola was contained, thankfully.

Lindsay Lohan left a club shortly after Paris Hilton arrived. She was probably concerned with everyone seeing her vagina and going bald after a night with Paris.

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