Aquarius Listen to your inner drives. If you’re strongly drawn to performing and being in the spotlight, do what it takes to foster this side of your creativity. If you’re strongly drawn to women, get some cash and head to the Lion’s Den. You’re not getting any anytime soon. Cancer The stars want you to…
Today’s tip: don’t drink Franzia Chardonnay, Rum and Natty in one sitting. Don’t trust a beverage in a box, let alone alcohol This morning’s topic was the “Femperv,” based on a girl who kept losing her suit at the pool yesterday. Hear a drunk girl talk about it. Hear a guy talk about something that…
Capricorn You know there’s some truth to the rumors, but you won’t contribute to a friend’s troubles. Congratulations! It’s a fine line to walk, but if anyone can cross this tightrope like a champ, it’s you. DUI Checkpoints are fun for the whole family! Gemini A forgetful type spills the beans on a crucial aspect…
I ran over an article at askmen.com about getting your girlfriend’s friends to like you. We questioned whether you would even want to take the effort. Segment 1Segment 2 O.J. never really liked Nicole’s new friends In other show activity… A ghost called the show. “Have you ever wondered: Chuck Norris on the Titanic Edition.”…
Leo It’s not just your retirement portfolio that should be diversified — think about your life portfolio. Instead of doing what’s comfortable and safe, think about what scares you just a little bit. Then tackle it. You might need some friends to help, as Big Bird is one stout individual. Sagittarius You’re a little bit…
Scroll down to check out the CBS advertising on eggs. Photoshop decided I needed some of my own.
Oprah wants you to know that her and Gayle King aren’t gay for each other. Oprah and Gayle talk four times a day, and apparently that’s enough to make Oprah paranoid. I doubted Oprah’s claim as it seems girls are always on the phone with each other and no one questions it. In this segment,…
Aquarius Genuine satisfaction is the result of profound self-knowledge, dim lighting and “C” batteries. Cancer You’re fine-tuning your living space. All these home improvements lead to some happy unexpected changes in other parts of your life too. Although, people at work know what you’re up to with that new hot tub, and your rumored rendezvous…
CBS is going to start advertising on eggs in grocery stores. At first, I thought they meant on the egg cartons, not on the eggs themselves. I was wrong. How EGGciting! CBS: We eat Havana Omelets (definition here)
My parents had an encounter with their neighbors. The neighbors were shooting birds and squirrels in my parents’ yard. We talked about awkward encounters with neighbors. Segment 1 Segment 2 Mmmm. Bloody Tom Hanks hand smells good. In other show activity… The Old Woman called in. She’s on meth. The Old Woman called back. Still…
Virgo Are you so busy worrying about what might (or might not) happen next that you’re forgetting to count all the blessings you already have? The stars are telling you to celebrate. Time to pull out the miniature poker table for some good old fashioned Barbie strip poker. Capricorn Some recent shake-ups in your life…
No Internet made for an interesting show today. One highlight from that experience was the one story we had in the 6:10 Stooks Scoop, that I had to try to recall from (drunken) memory from CNN Headline News. Luckily, we had a Free for All Friday to hide the flaws. The Stoner called in, worried…
Scroll down to see my thoughts and some of the stats on guys wearing women’s jeans. We talked about how difficult it would be for a guy to pull this off. We heard from a guy who recommended Wrangler’s for a more women-jeans-like experience. The High Lady’s friend called in about it, but in typical…
Aquarius Ever noticed you always get chatted up when you’re feeling relaxed? How sexy you are has very little to do with how you look. It’s your resemblance to Sloth from Goonies that’s scaring people away. Cancer It’s so easy to get caught up in everyone else’s agenda, but any more of this and you’ll…
Ever since he wept at the end of American Idol, Hasselhoff has been pressuring me into buying a video capture card for my computer so I can have his array of ridiculous facial expressions to share along with his ridiculous speaking on America’s Got Talent. Not to mention the new brace he’s wearing around his…
Men are wearing women’s jeans. Apparently, it’s the new “punk-rock thing.” They like them tight around the legs, and it keeps the jeans from getting tangled in a bike chain or a skateboard…since apparently this is a major problem. Maybe if a thrasher wore the right size men’s jeans to begin with, we wouldn’t have…
So, Photoshop Adam calls me last night. “Dude, did you go into Little Apple Bush (Little Apple Market is the correct name) earlier?” “Yes,” I said. “You need new wheels.” So PSA starts hating on my ride. But I don’t care. All I want in a car is to get me from Point A to…
Capricorn Doing something right doesn’t just feel good — it feels great. This inspires you to look for more good deeds to perform, and to get others on the same generosity track. Then, one day, maybe we can live in a world without people tying up the check-out line trying to decide between Orange or…
Two clips from Sesame Street.A weird flashpack piece about a band. The guy in the band who keeps talking about some girl sounds like a mix between Tommy Chong and Tony Danza (“Tonny Chongza” as I call him). Elmo singing the “Wuba wuba wuba woo woo woo (or something similar) Song.” Finally, a classic clip…
The High Lady went on an extended rant today. Curious about chocolate milk? Here’s “Chocolate Milk Chat with Chip Rimaldi. ” Today’s guest is Benji Homona. Lactose issues By the way, the above photo comes from this website. It’s just a series of photos with this woman and select beverages, and either “thumbs up” or…
Leo Now is a good time to follow someone else’s lead, especially when it comes to your career. A coworker with a strong instinct for business can clear a path and show you what to do — and what not to do. That coworker’s name? Obi Wan Kenobi…the Moroccan guy who cleans the toilets. Sagittarius…
Chris saw Pirates of the Caribbean last night. There was a baby in the theater. Amazingly, the baby didn’t cry. However, not everyone is so lucky. So we talked about the possibility of rules against babies. This segment has a guy with a brilliant idea: switches for babies. This one has a woman who won’t…
Aquarius You pursue this current goal full-throttle, determined to reach success. This tenacious attitude gets you what you want, and then some, whether it’s a promotion at work or a new and vivacious social life. Just don’t go around telling people “my social life is so vivacious these days!” That’ll probably paint an unpleasant picture.…
“We’re in touch…so you be in touch.”
Another “Free for All Friday” today, so get ready for some randomness. This guy is wasted and spreading the love. This guy thinks CNN sucks. Hear about Jennifer Aniston’s downgrade and whether cheerleading is a sport. Hear about old people driving, people not working and more arguments on Jennifer Aniston’s downgrade and cheerleading as a…
I have to type this thing out every day anyway, so I figured I’d start putting it online, too.Capricorn You’ve been frugal and practical long enough. The stars say it’s time to splurge. The stars also say “is it hot in here or is it just me?” Gemini Don’t worry about all the contracts, paperwork…
DeMone the Demon called in because of today being 07/06/06. And The Stoner has an interesting plan for tonight’s midnight showing of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest. “Check out the camel toe on Gary!” Sorry, that’s all the fresh content you get today. But we do have some clips we found that we…
I was annoyed by a kid who had a laser pointer last night at Sundown Salute, Junction City’s ridiculously impressive 4th of July celebration. We explained how he needs to realize how lame laser pointers are these days (even more so than they ever have been, amazingly). To help him, and other clueless people, we…
It seems like a lot of people got the day off or are taking the day off for an extended weekend. At least one group is having a 4th of July Eve party. We shot off some fireworks in the studio to celebrate the holiday. One caller shared a story about a bad combination of…
We tried to help with our little “relationship rescue” today. Since a lot of people have a long weekend for the holiday, we thought we’d try to do some good by making your loved ones more tolerable. Our callers shared what the opposite sex does to annoy them. Segment 1Segment 2Segment 3 “I’ll eat your…