If you don't have a MySpace account (my page here), you're missing out on a whole different world of advertising.

Labels: advertising, internet

I can understand Norm MacDonald caving, but I thought there were enough "ugly evil guy" roles to keep Steve Buscemi from voicing a ginger bread man in a "Go Phone" commercial. The world ain't right.

Labels: advertising, tv

This ad for "Hydroderm" is ridiculous.

Labels: advertising, dumbasses

I'm watching the KU-Pitt State basketball game. The broadcast has already horrified me twice, only 30 minutes into the game.

First off, Sasha Kaun is sporting a giant pubic mass on his head. I hope to God he doesn't keep growing this thing out. It already looks much more pubic than the picture below.



UPDATE: Sasha looks like absolute death with 12 minutes to go.

Secondly, I saw one of those commercials where the athletes are sweating Gatorade. Can you believe these "sweating Gatorade" commercials are still around? I can't find it online, but it's the football one where the guy is sweating the piss-colored Gatorade, delivers a hit, more piss flies around, and then Bill Parcells shows up in a tollbooth and says something about a Golden Shower or something. I'm not sure, but it's weird as hell.

Labels: advertising, jayhawks, sports, tv

Lipitor has a commercial based on an endorsement from Richard Jarvik, inventor of the artificial heart.

But wouldn't you say the inventor of the artificial heart would want people's hearts to fail so he can put a baboon heart in them? And, I've yet to meet a single person with an artificial heart. It's hardly saving billions of lives. Come on, Lipitor. How dumb do you think we are?

Besides, this Jarvik character is more than a tad on the creepy side.

Labels: advertising, health

Have you seen the new iPhone ads with the douches talking about why they needed an iPhone? One particular ad annoys the hell out of me. The guy talks about how he had to carry a bag around to hold all of his electronic devices. Yes, I've done the same, but this guy's reasoning is really messed up (bold mine).

"I had the iPod, I had a camera, and I had a regular phone, and a phone for text messaging and emails and stuff like that."

So, explain again why you carried around two phones? At first, I hoped he was saying that he had a landline phone. But in the context of "needing a bag to carry it around," he has a regular cell phone and a separate phone dedicated for "text messaging and emails and stuff like that." Why would you have two phones if one of them can do text messaging and email? Are you talking on the phone and sending text messages at the same time? What kind of messed up savant are you, anyway?

Labels: advertising, dumbasses, tech

I'm shocked at the free publicity for Taco Bell's "Steal a Base, Steal a Taco" promotion (bold mine).

There has been at least one stolen base in every World Series matchup since 1990. When the first base is stolen, the unit of Yum Brands Inc, will announce a Tuesday afternoon when consumers will be able to walk into the chain's participating 5,800 outlets and ask for a free taco. Anyone who walks into a participating outlet during the give-away period would be eligible for a free taco.

This is not a good deal. I'm just not shit-faced enough on a Tuesday afternoon to appreciate Taco Bell. Even when I'm drunk, Taco Bell is a last resort.

"Nothing else close by when you're wasted? Go to Taco Bell."

Hey, Taco Bell! Why haven't you hired me, yet? I totally owned the drive-thru when I worked at McDonald's in high school.

Labels: advertising, alcohol, drugs, fast food, restaurants

I love weight loss advertising.

Labels: advertising, fatties

I always find it funny when a bunch of people get pissed and go after a business, intending harm.

The latest involves three businesses in Johnson County. A grand jury indicted them for promoting obscenity. Hollywood at Home for four DVDs, Spirit Halloween for obscene costumes, and Priscilla's for five sex toys and a videos.

Free advertising!

I wouldn't have heard of, or even noticed, the Lion's Den in Abilene if it weren't for all the stories of obscene products, watchdogs writing down customers' license plate numbers, or the giant "Every time you wank to porn, the baby Jesus cries" (paraphrased) billboard.

Labels: advertising, porn, random nonsense

Labels: advertising, random nonsense

"If you thought Superbad was funny the first time, just wait 'til you see it the second time."

I'm not trying to pick on Superbad, as I would like to see it, but I've had enough of this "If you thought (blank) was (blank) the first time, just wait 'til you see it the second time" type of advertising.

How are they making good on their promise of "wait 'til you see it the second time?" Are they adding hilarious scenes to the movie weeks after it comes out? Are they giving out prizes for second-time viewers? No. They do nothing. Unacceptable.

Here's how I propose fixing the problem:

"If you thought Superbad was funny the first time, just wait 'til you see it the second time. You see, you probably didn't notice that if you watch the movie like it's a Magic Eye, the movie morphs into a montage of midget clowns riding ponies and throwing whipped cream pies at each other."

Hello? Hollywood? Why isn't my phone ringing?

Labels: advertising, movies

What happens when six perpetually flaccid, yet musically inclined, buddies all discover Viagra at the same time?

Take a look.

Labels: advertising, random nonsense

I'm not a big fan of commercials that take an obvious Carl Weathers and place him in a role such as "Alex Keeth, President of Old Spice Marketing." If you can't take Carl Weathers and put him into a commercial as either Carl Weathers or Apollo Creed, you have a problem.

In fact, if the commercial just started with "Hi, I'm Carl Weathers, here to promote Old Spice's latest marketing initiative: Tony Stewart's armpits," the spot would've been much better. It's not like you're going for authenticity here.

Labels: advertising

The Delorean might make a comeback. Now Christopher Lloyd can pimp something other than DirecTV. Every one of those DirecTV commercials depresses me in a profound way.

Labels: advertising, random nonsense

I just found out I'm competing against Andre Agassi in my job search.

Labels: advertising

Labels: advertising

Google is one of the best companies of all time, but it still has its kinks.

Google's AdSense program allows blogs and other websites to make money. Google passes along some of the money it makes when visitors click on an ad.

Google brags about its ability to deliver targeted ads to your website. Moreover, Google brags about its ability to deliver its clients' ads to potential clients through AdWords.

As of this writing, my ad client was pimping Silica Gel, a topic I tackled two days/five posts ago.

Labels: advertising

I think MySpace might need to be more careful where they post their internal links. One pixel away from a pay-per-click ad might be a little questionable.

Being a reluctant MySpacer myself, I clicked on an ad by mistake the other day. My mad mousing skills added to my worry.

Labels: advertising